Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Maybe singing about how you'd bang Morgan Freeman to the tune of Single Ladies while holding champagne and a box of Cheerios wasn't the best first impression on his parents
Randomize
