he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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