the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Randomize