I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
