Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
