Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I think your dad took our porno
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Randomize