weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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