Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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