omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
