you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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