It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize
