I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize