Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
