weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
