I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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