I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Randomize
