Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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