you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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