I'm lost and stupid without you.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize