im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
