.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
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