arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
You paid the taxi driver with a comb last night.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize