She announced her abortion via fbk
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Randomize
