i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Randomize
