I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
