found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
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