Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I just poured my flask into a drink. Then I realized the drink belonged to the guy next to me so I stole it from him. He confronted me and I made out with him to distract him. When I looked up, I realized his wife was watching. Its barely 10:00.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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