I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
In America we eat man semen.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
