I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
