how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize
