My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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