Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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