I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
