CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
So apparently I’m into choking now
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