I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Randomize
