You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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