I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
