he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
