I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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