I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
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