On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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