Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
