go do what you do best...puke behind churches
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
Randomize
