I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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