Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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