Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
