I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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