Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
When did we convert life to cartoon?
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
