yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize