Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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